Last night as my friend Jess and I were headed home, ice cream in hand, I had agreed to go with her on a hike up the Czech Republics highest mountain. We were to meet outside the flat at 8am and take a train, a bus and another bus, 2.5 hours north east of Prague to the bottom on Snezka Mountain. The weather looked a little iffy but we had wet weather gear and it was only rain. Oh how wrong we were. The rain came along with its friends Hail, Thunder and Lightning. We were in for a right treat. Barely 30 minutes in and they arrived in full force and didn’t leave for a good 45 minutes, possibly longer.
After the first 10 minutes our shoes were soaked through but THANK GOD for waterproof jackets! It was turning out to be les miserables but on we marched and the higher we got it started to clear.
There was one silver lining with all this hiking, it leaves you alone with your thoughts and makes it ever so slightly easier to while away the minutes by letting your mind wander. So wander it did and for some reason I was taken back to something which happened to me before I left for this trip.
Shortly before I had to start packing up my life into boxes and bags to get to the North, I was told by someone that I was “cold and heartless for leaving”. I told them to fuck off as I certainly didn’t need that sort of negativity in the lead up to my departure. I was later given an apology but the damage was done, the words were spoken and could not be taken back. The friendship was changed as I now knew how this person felt, I was cold and heartless for moving overseas and not thinking about how it would affect them. Well to be honest, I wasn’t thinking about them. I was the one moving overseas, they weren’t.
I don’t know why but those words made me feel angry and annoyed and quite frankly it was a mean thing to say because I’m not those things. As I was schlepping it up the mountain I realised I shouldn’t have been angry or annoyed because it had nothing to do with me, it was all them and they were just being selfish. I was going away because I needed to get away from Sydney for a while. I need to be striving towards something and not settled somewhere I no longer wanted to be. I wanted to get out and it was a decision I made with my family and for myself. I wasn’t thinking about other people expect my family and they were more than happy for me to go.
As I walked, I thought about why I’m doing this trip and it’s because I need to awake something inside of me. Something in my soul needs to be moved and I want to be shaken up so this year I will be. Our group have spoken about getting outside people’s comfort zones and as cliched as that sounds, it’s very true. I have packed up and moved half way around the world to live, travel, work with 74 other people for a whole year. If that’s not a good start then I don’t know what is. It might not work out the way I hope but at least I know I tried because the alternative of being still and unmoved in Sydney is not an option, at least not right now. This is my escape for a little while, so I say this to that person who felt the need to make my trip all about them, let me escape. Let me do this for me because I’m not doing it for anyone else. Let me be a little bit selfish and go and do me for the next year. You concentrate on doing you.
Poland. Views for days.
We made it.